The Temple of Fake News Pt. 4

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Meme War 2: Electric Boogaloo

With the release of the Project Veritas tapes, CNN's credibility fell completely apart. Sure, to the educated viewer that had happened years ago, but this was the final nail in the coffin of CNN’s ability to claim unbiased coverage. CNN however was about to do something that was even arguably worse than any of the shenanigans it had been involved in so far. It all began when Donny “Orange Cheeto Hitler” Trump decided to celebrate his vindication by Project Veritas (and winning the great meme war that was the election) the way that all presidents have done so since Andrew Jackson; retweeting a dank ass meme from reddit:

cnnfightYeah, thats some dignified world class memeing

Now let's be honest here, this is about the most unpresidential thing one can do, but hey, what's CNN to do about it? I mean they could call him out on the fact that this is not how a president is supposed to act. But since you've made it this far into our meme adventure, journeying to the fake news temple, you know damn well that's not what CNN was about to do. No not even close, CNN was about to react in the worse possible way having obviously not read the official rules of the internet.

CNN, in the throws of a bout of pearl clutching not seen since a black man gained entrance to a country club, actually decided that in order to get back at Trumpty Dumpty they were going to ask reddit to out the real name of the person initially responsible for the meme (/u/HanAssholeSolo). For those keeping score at home, some kid made a joke on the internet, a sitting president retweeted it, and a major news network went out of there way to track him down. Sounds like it is not a problem right? If CNN had stopped there it wouldn't have been; but now that you know what kind of organization CNN has become you'll realize that this was never going to be the case. They decided to release this as an official statement:

han asshole solo

Dear lord CNN, what is wrong with you? You couldn't just ask nicely for an interview? If you don’t feel like reading the above because you're trying to make your train on time or something let me break it down for you. “Keep making memes about CNN and we will fucking dox you and humiliate you in front of an international audience.” In the space of less than five years, CNN went from reporting the news to being the thought police. If a president tweeting a meme was bad, the reaction from an accredited group of journalists was ten times worse. Needless to say internet collectively lost their goddamn mind.


4chans’ /pol/ board immediately declared a meme jihad, and many on other parts of the internet followed suit. The whole debacle got labeled meme war 2, the original meme war being the effort to get Trumpenstien elected in the first place. Fresh from their previous victory, the denizens of the internet were no less effective here. #cnnblackmail immediately began to trend on twitter, becoming number one overnight. CNN’s ratings began to tank and meme after meme hit social media. Seriously if you’ve got some time, and you haven't done it already, grab a cup of coffee and google CNN memes.

cnn blackmail

CNN had finally stepped on an active landmine and their ratings went downhill so far that they were losing to Nick at Nite and the Discovery Channel. Thats right, reruns of the Dick Van Dyke Show and watching documentaries about sharks became a more useful thing to do in people's minds than the reporting by CNN.

I believe they call this: bad. Its an industry term that means the opposite of good.

network rating

Despite all this, all the missteps, all the lying, all the blackmail, the tanking primetime ratings; Zuckertron still refuses to right this ship. He’s even recently still putting out the same opinion pieces masquerading as news. Fake news if you will, and as we will see with our next and final segment fellow internet archeologists there's no sign of this cavern of shit that CNN has become getting fixed anytime soon.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5